I said I'm not a baker.. I don't know what made me think I should do this, but I did anyway. And I proved my point. Twice.
The latest issue of
Gourmet Traveller is French inspired, and a quick flick through it at Coles made me buy it. I love the flavours and richness of French cuisine and pretty much every page held something I wanted to eat. Immediately.
So last night, in the spirit of Bastille Day, I decided to give
Pain Au Chocolat a go.. how could this not be a good idea! I'd make up a batch, cook two to try out, and have fresh Pain Au Chocolat, with crispy, flaky pastry and still hot and melty chocolate goodness inside Saturday morning. Boy was I wrong.
Before I continue, there's something you should know. I don't get along well with sticky. Sticky tape will always fold over for me. Glad wrap ends up being a ball. Sticky items and me are not friends.
The other thing that you should know is - I don't have a rolling pin. In an ode to a well stocked liquor supply, I've always used a bottle of Smirnoff wrapped in, funnily enough, Glad Wrap, when I needed to roll something. Which isn't often, because remember, I don't bake.
Fail #1.
This is basically down to the reason I don't bake. Because I don't like to follow recipes. Had I actually read the recipe, instead of skimming it for the keys points - bash butter with a bottle of Smirnoff until it's dough like, roll it out, and then something about grease proof paper. And in this, I failed twice.
1. I got a little bit smart, and figured that if I rolled the butter onto a chopping board, it'd be easier to manage than if I rolled it onto the bench. Only a little bit smart, because rolling it onto the chopping board presented the same problem as rolling it onto the bench - the butter was then stuck to it. It was just portable. Not to worry, I'll just use a spatula to scrap it off onto grease proof paper (not sticky), which going back and reading, the recipe actually tells you to roll it like this to start with. Genius.
By this stage, my housemate is greatly amused with what's going on.
2. The spatula process was going well, I was making progress, getting the butter off the board, in large chucks that would be easy to roll back out again - scrap, tap, scrap, tap, scrap, tap, crap - grease proof paper is slippery, especially on a counter that has considerable amounts of butter on it, and is now on the floor, in true buttered item style - butter side down.
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Butter side down |
Not to worry, I've learnt my lesson, this'll be easy to do again with fresh butter. It was.
Fail #2.
Bread dough is sticky (sticky). Very sticky (sticky). Even sticks to grease proof paper. Which I cleverly rolled it out onto, to stop it from sticking to the bench, because it's sticky, and I know I'm no good with sticky.
End result - dough went in bin. Butter went in fridge to await store bought pastry.
I lay in bed afterwards, still smelling slightly buttery and yeasty, reflecting on the cooking success that was my night and I realised something - although my mother, my aunt and my nan are all amazing cooks, I can remember all 3 of them using store bought pastry for the various, amazing pastry related goods they produced over the years - not to say they didn't make pastry at some stage.. I'm sure they just picked their fights better.
Lesson learnt - I won't be attempting to make pastry again. Soon.